For the last few weeks there have been no posts here as I have been immersed chaos with my move, crashing computers (2) and hectic schedule at work…no excuses (bullshit) but getting back to this is grueling as I feel in some way I need to make excuses that justify (there are none) and in other ways the focus is off.
As most of you know in the cycle of “tomorrow I’ll start over”, it’s easy to continue same old same old and put hope in the turning of the leaf which takes effort and never arrives. Perfectionism also plays in this where the expectation of doing things perfectly or even ‘right’ for that matter justifies the not doing of them at all.
Enough said? So moving on…
I think the above post says a lot and here is a little story. I like going to the gym but tend to get a little over zealous and over-do it once I get rolling. For example, several years ago I joined a gym and started going more than once a day. The gym was open from 5am to 11pm, which made it easy to get there early and again later.
As with all things this overdoing it creates a dynamic where we burn out quickly and I was unable to maintain the pace regardless of the fact the time wasn’t spent productively anyway (can anyone say obsessive compulsive 
). As you guessed I stopped going not to return for some time – part of my inability to take initiative was based upon the idea that if I went then there had to be a routine that was grueling. I spent some time processing this and started going again – I allowed myself to go only five times/week and when I’d falter, which I did I would go to the gym, sit at the juice bar for a few minutes and leave. This trick supported me in maintaining my commitment keeping the routine. Balance – reasonable expectations, moderation, decision/commitment, behavior modification and a little humility is all that was required.
In our journey it’s important to seek balance and avoid thoughts that define a right way and a wrong way of doing things. Try to spend some time today observing yourself and the degree of your decision/commitment. This could be at work or in your roles as mothers/fathers/sons/daughters/employee/friend/lover etc… Is there balance, are you aware of a lack of initiative due to thoughts of perfection?
I wonder if this post is too personal, not uplifting enough and that is missing that inspirational piece which is so important not only for readers but also for me…see what I mean?? J
Give yourself permission to make a commitment to do your best even when you feel it’s not good enough.
